Relationships are a 2 way street!! DAY 29
Aug 6, 2018
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omltmksF2lQ

[Music]
I want to say Sunday but you were gonna
see this on Monday you know I thinking
about that last night it was like you
know I'm always saying welcome to the
day that I'm doing which I think would
be the right thing but they don't the
same time I'm like I don't know maybe
I'm saying it the wrong way maybe it
should be
welcome to Monday because that's the day
you guys are seeing this and my necklace
is all crank holding anyway um so
welcome - it is a good day
oh yeah well it will be it will be a
good day for living - the future um no
welcome to Sunday my Sunday your Monday
um today was enough fantastic fantastic
day it was I got so much done this
weekend that I wanted to get done which
is such an amazing feeling win you have
such a big to-do list and expectations
that you want to reach goals to be made
and met and so when you see those things
being checked off it's like you feel so
much more accomplished and that's where
I'm at like right now it's like I just
feel like a million pounds have been
lifted off of my shoulders with all of
the stuff that I have been trying so
hard to get accomplished this last
couple of weeks but within the last
couple of days I've really been able to
utilize my body in times that I couldn't
before so I'm just like yeah like I am
feeling so pumped in so many fun
fantastic ways because
I'm being able to get household chores
done and things organized it's like so
yeah we got a lot of stuff done this
weekend we still have some more to do
but I have to remind myself that you
know we still have forever to meet these
these two dude Alyssa's but what that's
bad we gonna take all the years to come
so we were able to really get in there
and and get some stuff organized this
weekend which was amazing so I changed
up things with my routine because with
September coming and school going back
into session and me wanting to preschool
the babies and you know hopefully Ali's
business will continue to pick up more
so now that we're getting kind of
further into like where I mean I know
we're still in summer but you know we're
transitioning more into fall which is
getting ready for like holidays and
things like that so it's gonna be a
great opportunity for us to be able to
get his business ruling even more than
it has been but with that I was talking
to ollie today and I was like you know I
really think that we need to make a nice
routine schedule I am I'm really good
about making routines but then sticking
to him as a whole a whole nother level I
knew that was gonna happen I'm sorry I'm
gonna be kind of a little bit darker
tonight my light just blew out my ringy
light yeah I gotta charge it tonight um
so uh but anyways so I'm really bad
about sticking to the plan once I make
it it's great it looks beautiful on
paper but then it's like when we're
gonna actually do it is a whole nother
level and one thing that we've always
for some reason just really struggled
with was
I don't want to say bedtime with the
kids because back before the babies were
born Ollie was working a job where he
was swing shift so he wouldn't even come
home and tell like 11:30 11:45 and he
would come home and then that's kind of
when our day started like we would make
our dinner and we would eat and you know
spend our family time and at that time
Jeremiah was still not even in school
yet so he was on our same schedule as we
were so we wouldn't even go to bed until
usually 3:00 4:00 in the morning
sometimes even five o'clock in the
morning and we would sleep until
basically only you know time for Ollie
to get up to go to work the next day and
then I would kind of start my day and
then we would just kind of do that so
and Jeremiah has always been a really
really really rough sleeper when it
comes to sleep he is a type of child
that technically could go with like I am
no joke like two to three hours of sleep
at night and he could go all day and act
like he got 12 hours of sleep and he's
been that way since a baby so like when
he was little little and I was the only
parent really taking care of that
situation with his sleeping um for the
first year and a half I would maybe go
on like two hours of sleep at night
because he his schedule of sleeping was
so often I thought I'd had to do with
the fact that he was coming from you
know a time difference from totally
around the world so I I thought that was
it but then I thought well gosh you know
you would think like was in a few months
I could get him on a different sleeping
schedule I know that just and that
didn't work and so I went for the first
year and a half just I I felt like a
walking zombie and what I ended up doing
with him was one time but he was little
he was like well it was right after you
know
received him and I was rocking him to
sleep and I was sitting on the edge of
my bed and thank God my bed was on the
floor so it wasn't like really high but
I was rocking him and I remember his
bassinet sitting right in front of me
and I was so tired he had just I mean I
I had went from not having any
responsibility of kids being able to
sleep all night long to boom change and
so and usually you know as a mother that
carries a baby your body kind of
transitions you know because the baby
inside your womb is on its own kind of
schedule so you kind of work with that
schedule with the baby at least I know
in my you know my personal experience
you know my babies there were times that
they would come more active and then
there were times when they were more
low-key and so I was able to kind of
like get my routine around their routine
in a way of that kind of sounds that
makes any sense but with him it's just
you know that baby comes to in places
right in your hands and that was my
first baby my first responsibility of
being a mom and I remember rocking him
to sleep and the next thing you know I
rocked myself to sleep and I woke up to
him rolling down my arms down my legs
and thank God he just kind of like
rolled off my feet and just laying it on
his back and looked at me like Hello it
didn't hurt him he didn't hit anything
but to this day I cried and oh it's
juice right but anyways so he's just
always been that type of a child so I
never for the firt I mean gosh really
honestly it just he's just been a really
hard sleeper so about when he was about
five the doctors started having us give
him a low dose of melatonin to kind of
help him and at first I was really
hesitant because I was just like you
know I feel bad because I'm have to give
my son sleepy meds and you know but then
you know it was explained to me that
it's a natural
you know basically it's a natural herb
that's just generating basically what
melatonin you already have in your body
that helps you go to sleep but this
could just kind of amps it a little bit
so I started with a low dose of that and
it really did help to a point um but
he's always he's been such a mama's boy
that he like until he was about seven he
didn't want to start sleeping in his own
room he would sleep because I have to
sleep in a recliner because of my
breathing issues at night my sleep apnea
but also because of my back and sleeping
straight on my bed there were just be no
wakes no way I I can't so before I got
my recliner I would sleep on we have a
sectional so I would sleep on one side
and then he would sleep on the other
side and poor ollie would sleep in the
bedroom on the next day he was off or
you know whatever because he would he
always slept in the room and so anyways
he is such a mama's boy that to this day
I will be like barely dozing off and all
sudden I'll hear his I'll find a mom out
I'm like son are you gonna be 20 still
wanting to sleep with momma so he sleeps
on the couch next to me just you know
that's his comfort and I'm totally cool
with it until he starts snoring and then
then sometimes I'm like maja go in your
room you're keeping me awake and so I'll
kick him into his room but anyways off
the topic of where I was going with this
um so but since the babies have been
born we've pretty much been on a pretty
good sleeping pattern with the little
ones but Jeremiah still struggles with
the sleeping and so he's still to this
day has to take melatonin in order to be
able to go to sleep if he doesn't have
that dose he literally will lay in his
room and come out sometimes so
frustrated because he couldn't go to
sleep and it'll be like four o'clock in
the morning I'll be like uh mommy I just
can't sleep and I'm like well baby did
you take your melatonin you'll be like
no I forgot and I'm like oh
I'm like okay well let's get your
monotone in and you know cuz he's really
good about being able I mean he's almost
11 so he knows how to get his own
melatonin and give it to himself it's
just you know the little chewable pills
um but he's just yeah it's really bad so
when school times started and putting
him on a sleeping schedule it's very
challenging because when you have a
child that does not sleep well any
commotion going on in the home is just
gonna abrupt the entire sleeping for him
so last year we really had challenges
because he just was really struggling
with his sleeping so this year I'm
hoping that I can figure out something
I've been doing a little bit of research
on things that will kind of transition
him into sleeping so I'm wondering you
know if maybe you guys have some
suggestions if any of your children have
ever had like sleeping issues where you
just have a child that just or even
yourself that you just can't seem to
shut that brain off to be able to get
into sleep mode I would greatly
appreciate any recommendations because I
am so concerned he's going into fourth
grade and you know he needs his sleep
and lot not last year but the year prior
he was falling asleep in school and I
was just like I don't know what to do
like I am such at a loss because he can
go hours upon hours upon hours of not
sleeping and then boom he'll crash and
he'll crash for a couple hours and then
he's back up again and he can go the
whole day and have nothing wrong with
them and the great the teachers were
amazing because they understood what was
going on at home so they never you know
he never got in trouble and you know the
students knew just to let him be and let
him have his nap if that's what he
needed and but I felt so bad because
it's you know it's gonna be embarrassing
that you're in class and then all sudden
you just find yourself dead asleep you
know and it's like you know and I feel
bad it's a mom because you know I've got
the teachers well he's like holiness
like a class and I'm like
know what to do so last year was a lot
better I will say that we didn't have
any sleeping episodes and you know he
did really well in school which was
amazing he got amazing grades attendance
was awesome you know he did really
really good but this year with the
fourth grade year I'm just I'm just like
okay we've gotta figure out something so
we can all get on a good routine um you
know moving from summer routine of being
relaxed and you know I mean he had a
bedtime still for summertime but it's
more of a relaxed bedtime versus school
time he's gonna have to have a more
stricter one some people say well you
know 11 year old they should be going to
bed like by 8:30 9 o'clock and it's like
he goes to bed more like 10:30
um and he wakes up at 8 and he's totally
fine like he's the type of child you
wake him up he balances up and he's
ready you like he's good
but I still feel like you know I there
should be more of a better bedtime and a
routine of getting him just in that you
know I don't know if maybe I should
transition him from you know okay well
we're gonna start with you know get your
jammies on brush your teeth maybe read a
story or does he need to have some down
time to read like a story in bed I don't
know like I'm such at a loss so I'm
looking to all of my amazing friends to
tell me what maybe I could try because I
don't know and my babies they'll go down
like you know we lay them down and
sometimes they could be little turds but
most of the time they're out within 10
minutes of us putting them out and
they're down and they'll be down for the
night well I knocked on wood um but I
mean they're usually really good about
sleeping so my challenge is really
Jeremih like I'm just trying to figure
out where we can meet in the middle of
that schedule things
so anyways but with that I don't know
how I got onto rambling about that but
um I just told only that I really want
to get into a really good routine
starting full
with you know Sunday's being our deep
scrub house day where we all get in and
we really busted out and clean it today
I was so proud of myself all he did the
dishes unloaded and reloaded the
dishwasher I scrubbed the bathroom I
dusted down my hallway my entry table
Jeremiah went through and vacuumed and
then he mopped
but he also cleaned his bedroom those
were his chores and I scrubbed the rest
of the kitchen got the counters cleaned
up again I folded laundry I got the
laundry put away and I just feel like I
am actually being able to participate in
the chores now and not just sitting on
my chair and barking orders and
everybody to do things like I feel like
I can actually participate and get stuff
done also while my family is also
helping so I told him that I really want
to see if Sunday's we can make that are
you know really our housecleaning day
like our scrubbing day and then the rest
of the week you know just do our regular
cleaning schedule but we don't have to
like mop and dust you know just the
regular picking up vacuuming and dishes
and counter white-bean and stuff so
that's I'm really hoping to get a good
schedule going for winner I mean for
fall and that way then we feel more like
we are being more productive during our
days rather than feeling kind of like
we're just like dogs chasing our tails
around in a circle not knowing where
we're going with what we're doing each
day um another thing I was gonna ask you
guys to it's because I've mentioned it a
couple times that I want to start doing
preschool with my with Omar and Ezra and
what I do it like Mondays in like
thinking Mondays and Thursdays because I
only want to do it like two days a week
and the only reason why because I don't
want to over stimulate that but do you
guys have any recommendations on some
preschool like act like nod activities
but maybe like websites that have like
free printables um I do want to go like
if you guys have any store ideas of
where to maybe go and look for some
preschool things because I really want
to work with Omar especially Omar on his
letters but Ezra too because I mean
I don't believe that there's any child
that's too young to learn so I really
want to get some stuff and be able to
really start organizing it now so when
school starts then I can start them in
the preschool and have fun with that I
think that's gonna be really fun and and
have certain things like play-doh that
we will only bring out during you know
preschool time after preschool we got to
put it away and that's just preschool
stuff I'm thinking of cleaning out my
one of my closets and just giving that
closet all to preschool stuff for them
it's under lock somebody can't get into
it because otherwise I will have
preschool stuff everywhere but yeah so
I'm just trying to kind of play around
and see what all I can do with their
preschool stuff because I think it would
be really fun and what else I think that
was it tomorrow is our big shopping day
I just you know that's been kind of what
I've been working on is just getting
everything organized cupboard wise and
stuff because I wanted to really see
what all we need I hate the fact and I
and I found so much stuff in the back
cupboards that we never even use and we
probably never will use because I bought
a lot of like stuff to make like Chili's
and stuff which are great don't get me
wrong but Chili's carry o or Chili's
beans in particular carry a lot of
calories and I'm really trying to
substitute that stuff out and bring
stuff in so I made a huge box of free
food that I posted up on Facebook and I
get to bless a family that needs some
extra food so I was really happy about
that made me feel good because I I know
the food's going somewhere that's going
to be used but anyways so tomorrow I'm
really excited to be able to get in the
store and and get some really good stuff
that are gonna make some really good
dinners
if you guys have any suggestions for
mills let me know
Pinterest ideas anything like that like
I am up for change change so um I am
going to be doing that tomorrow we're
pretty much gonna be shopping all day
because we've got like different stores
like we have to go to Costco we're gonna
go to Winco which is like a big I don't
know like it's just a big grocery store
and then we have to go to Walmart
because I got to get some household
stuff but um it will take us quite a few
quite a big chunk of the day and plus
tomorrow's my cat's away so we've got
that tomorrow morning which I am always
so excited about my counseling um
anyways but yeah so today was very
productive I feel like we got like I
said so much done this weekend which is
such an amazing billion it's like yes
I'm owning it I'm um so yeah I just I
really hope you guys had an amazing
mazing day thank you for continuing to
get your guys's names in for the drawing
I'm getting so excited because it's
getting so much closer to the drol day
um and I've been having fun getting this
box together like you guys I'm so
excited like I am really really really
excited so um I've been working on that
that's been really fun um and just the
messages that keep pouring in or Maisie
um what else was I gonna slate
there was something I was gonna say him
goodness gracious now it just blew my
mind
I don't remember I'll remember once I in
the video I watch that's how it works
right but anyways yes I really hope you
guys have an amazing day today tomorrow
I don't know now I've confused myself um
I hope you guys have a wonderful day
tomorrow
I just you guys never cease to amaze me
with the encouragement that you guys
give me and again I just really really
really really am hoping that we can get
my word out there my name out there so
we can get my channel growing I really
want to see more people join like I've
said before because I just you guys are
so amazing and I think we all deserve to
have amazing people in our lives that we
can all reach out to and I think that
that's an amazing thing you know I was
talking to ollie LA yesterday because he
had mentioned a comment he made a
comment to me yesterday and he said you
know I've noticed that you haven't
really been reaching out and calling
certain people and I was like yeah you
know I really haven't been I said you
know I just kind of at a point in my
life where I'm tired of being the one
that always puts the effort in you know
I feel like friendships and
relationships family ships I think that
they should be a two-way street and I
think I'm at a point now in my life
where it's like you know I've I've
always been the one to make the calls
you know make the efforts to go and see
people push things to try and you know
get a relationship to rule and
sometimes it just doesn't go anywhere
and but then the person still sitting
there waiting for that relationship to
be there and it's like okay but you you
know you gotta give too and so I've kind
of you know with all of you guys that
are so amazing and I have gained so many
new friends that it's like I don't fill
that void of having to feel like I have
to be on a one-way street because I feel
like there's so many amazing
opportunities to be with so many amazing
friends that you don't feel like I need
to have those one-way street
relationships much anymore and
unfortunately sometimes I think we get
to a point where it's like some
relationships just really dig up some
nasty feelings from the past and those
are some strong relationships to try and
have because you have to set so much
aside to have that relationship with
somebody and you know sometimes we're in
we're in the the life spot where we can
handle that and I don't know so much if
I've ever been really ready I think I
forced myself to be ready because I was
afraid to hurt people's feelings or you
know offend somebody but again that was
when Amy would always put herself on the
back burner and put other people's
feelings first and you know I finally
have come to realize that that's not
gonna get me anywhere like it really is
not gonna get me anywhere other than to
have a relationship that's very
uncomfortable the entire time we're
having a conversation and so I just kind
of backed off a little bit you know and
I just kind of accepted things the way
that they are with some of my
relationships and I'm at peace that the
relationship I don't know if it will go
much further or if there
be a whole lot more conversation or
communication or contact I don't really
know at this point but I think I'm done
pushing that I'm done putting efforts
because I'm I don't feel that I am less
of to be the only one that has to put
the work in for a relationship so when I
explained that to him he was like you
know that makes so much sense like I
understand you know when he said you
know I've really seen you really put
your effort into some of these
relationships and you have gone out of
your way and you're right like you don't
get anything in return not not in my
gifts or anything but you get nothing in
return of a phone call you know and
sometimes phone calls are great and I'm
not saying anything bad about that but
it's like you know I've offered to try
and do other things with you know some
of the people that I've tried
relationships with and it never happens
and it's like you know so I just finally
have accepted the fact of just saying
okay you know and always like yeah you
know I've noticed that now that you've
mentioned it your Ronnie and I'm like
yeah you know that it's okay though like
I'm not sad about it it more or less has
just shown me that I have amazing people
in my life that are worth a relationship
versus ones that could really care less
and I'm better than care less I'm better
than that so if that's okay then I'll
just take myself elsewhere and put my
energy into some relationships that are
amazing and nurture those relationships
because those are the type of
relationships that I want and so yeah I
am I'm just lately I've just been really
changing my my insight on relationships
because they do take two people to have
a relationship and if it's only one
party in the work
and the other one sitting there not
doing anything then obviously the one
that's sitting there not really putting
any efforts really could care less if
that relationship was there or not so
why are you gonna waste your time so
that's kind of where I've been with my
personal relationships I guess you could
say um and that's okay I'm I'm okay like
I don't feel like I'm missing out I
don't feel like I'm losing anything I'm
perfectly I'm perfectly content and I
think it is because I have all of you
and you guys are so awesome and you guys
know that because all the time and I
mean it and from the bottom of my heart
anyways okay like I say every night I'll
stop rambling here um I'm gonna go time
as in it's 9 o'clock so I'm gonna go and
get ready to put these little chickens
to bed because it is bedtime and then I
need to go jump in the shower because
I've just been cleaning all day and I
haven't had a chance
I really am loving the fact that you
guys are liking these turbines I'm
hoping to figure out some new styles
this is the only one that I have that
I've mastered so far and sometimes it
can take me a few times to get it on
before I actually get it like tonight I
think I ended up taking it off my head
like four times so finally I'm like okay
never mind in that I'm like no I gotta
do it what I want to figure something
out I will figure it out I always do and
so I'm trying to use my colors I have
tons of colors I don't know why I never
utilize them and put them together but
I'm gonna try so I hope you guys are
enjoying all my new little hope doodoos
and I'm hoping to figure out some more
fun things to do but anyways you guys
take care as always and I will see you
tomorrow
[Music]
